Sunday, December 13, 2009

Crossbows and Hockey Pads Are In Demand

Last night I went and saw The Aquabats put on an as-always awesome show. Back when I lived in SoCal, I caught them in concert as much as I could, but they rarely make it up this far north. It had been about five or six years since I'd seen an Aquabats show--far too long!

At any rate, with various of their songs now swirling around in my noggin, I was reminded of a little vow I've been meaning to post: One sweet day I will get the chance to run a Mutant Future campaign, and when that time comes this will be the themesong:



Lyrics for the sonically-challenged:

The radiation in the ground
Makes a lovely bubbly sound
The men in suits
Who don't eat fruit
Can't comprehend
The one-legged newt
That was caused from disaster
At reactor's core
A meltdown expected
To start a war
Now I bought myself
A lead ascot
It looks good but
I'm startin' to rot

Hey you,
With that green glow in your hair
I swear I see a tear
In your radiation wear
Somehow it's there

Razorblade boomerangs
And iron hands
Crossbows and hockey pads
Are in demand
Toxic waste
In synthetic place
Can add an eyeball
To your face

Hey you,
With that green glow in your hair
I swear I see a tear
In your radiation wear
Somehow it's there

Hey me
You know your gums
Are starting to bleed
I've got some shrink-to-fit
Mutated genes
And some bleak posterity
If they end up like me

I am the Humongous..
Everybody knows I own the wasteland
And now may I introduce to you
Benji The Tap-dancing Mutant boy
(Go Benji, Go)

"Hi I'm Benji
I'm a tap-dancing mutant
I wasn't always like this
I was born a normal boy
But now I live in this world of joy!"

It's Benji from Peoria
Don't drink the water
I implore ya
But his mom and dad
They were exposed
And that's how the neutrons grow

Hey you
With that green glow in your hair
Well I swear I see a tear
In your radiation wear
Somehow it's there

Hey me
You know your gums
Are starting to bleed
I've got some shrink-to-fit
Mutated genes
And some bleak posterity
If they end up like me

Just walk away...
Just walk away...
There's been too much violence...
Just walk away...
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